Shell-shock ... the liver wievels strike again!!!

I am just a little shell-shocked, but I am ok. I still feel strong, healthy notwithstanding the continuing bowel I am still ironing out, and I know I look good because everybody keeps saying so & this time I believe it because I am only 4 kg off my pre-diagnosis weight (63kg last weighed) and I feel pretty bloody good too. The sun is shining, I am about to spend 3 lovely weeks in Japan. I wont let the news get me down, I just need a few days to regroup. Yesterday my oncologist gave me my latest scan report & I'm afraid to say I have 3 new cancerous areas in my liver & the lung tumours continue to grow. My CEA (tumour marker) blood test has sky rocketed to double what it was 3 months ago so that probably explains why the liver tumors have appeared. Why is very difficult to say, but for sure I am been more relaxed about diet, etc so maybe a tightening of that would be useful. I have also allowed some stress to creep into every day life too, mainly caused by my laptop it has to be said. I cant deny some frustration trying to finish tracks for release & just the general feeling of energy disruption or depletion I feel when I am spending too much time answering too emails, trying to set up Mariana tours or events or generally getting sucked into Facebook, etc, in front of my wonderfully yet no doubt highly electromagnetically charged machine. So, resolution one is:

1. Get outdoors whenever possible. Light is life!

2. Forget about my ambitions, except those which are obviously healing. There's no point having 'success' if you are dead. Anyway I am already a good DJ, something that I can do in a state of almost meditative calm & which I enjoy very much. If I need to be creative with music thats how I can release it. That or finding an engineer to help me produce my tracks, if I really cant hold it in. I would really love to get my Tr nch works up till now done and dusted. But, not if it causes me stress!

3. Learn to surf. I've wanted to do it for years & this summer I am DEFINITELY going to start. Hopefully in the UK once I am back from Japan (to see some cherry blossom, do an event & then go to dear friends' wedding 4.6-23) then in California in August, where I hope to meet some friends so I can also go to Yosemite & the Redwood National Park to bond with some very very old & very very VERY tall ancient organisms who must have a lesson or two about my ambition to live to 100 years & out live the lot of you! I'm also looking forward to a week in Berlin in May.

That will do for now. As my new friend Tami said 'if they can grow in 3 months, then can go in 3 months'. I will toast my wheatgrass shot to that!

Be good & if you cant, for god's sake BE HEALTHY!!!
Dave

P.S. Race 3 on 31st March in Richmond - another 10k - still taking pledges. Even 10p per kilometre would be amazing, 50p brilliant! I am more motivated than ever to run the goal of 100km this year, to keep my fund going, plus raise some money for some wonderful small charities dear to me. PLEASE GIVE GENEROUSLY.

Spot the idiot... AsHford 10k COMPLETE!!!

54:13 my time, 347th out of 550 runners. Pretty happy with that (not so happy with my sweaty wet cast!)... WHOOP WHOOP!!!

These legs are made for running (and falling) ...

Oh dear. After some timely nagging by my dear father I looked at my blog only to see that as I think about the second 10k looming over the horizon (tmr!) I havent even blogged about the first!!! Shock horror... and my medal had been hanging proudly (or is it me proudly looking at it hanging?) in my hallway, ready to be joined over the year by another 8 or so, for a month! I hope to build up the distances over the year culminating in a no doubt leg aching half marathon if all goes well hence not 10 x 10k. So, I came in 79th out of 105 doing 5 miles in 44 minutes which I think is not too bad for a man with stage IV cancer & a fractured scaphoid, strapped up at the time but unknowingly hiding a fracture they didnt confirm til 2 weeks later from an unfortunate bicycle accident (I know, if its not one thing its another!) still, I am very much hoping to improve on my place in the next race (eek! its tomorrow AND its raining!) even though I havent been running as much as I'd like. If you felt how wet & sweaty this cast (i now have) gets after an hour long run you'd understand... 

So, RACE NO. 2 COMING UP TMW : : : THIS TIME A 10K (thats about 6 miles!) www.ashfordanddistrict10k.co.uk!!!

In case you missed it, I am doing the 100k challenge of which this race is part in aid of my local muliple sclerosis therapy centre, the Willow foundation (giving seriously ill young uns a day out to remember), my own treatment fund (running worryingly low) & the Ashinaga orphanage in Japan. So far I havent been able to raise anything like the pledges I need to reach my 10,000GBP target (though massive thanks for those kind people who have!). So, if you can pledge even just 10p per KM would be great... 1GBP or a dollar or 1000yen per km would be brilliant!!! you can pledge in the comments section or to my email!  

FYI the next 2 will be Richmond 10k on 31st March followed by  a charity 10k in Japan on 8th April, which I am very much looking forward to!

IN OTHER NEWS, I will go for some extensive dental work at the Munro Hall clinic in Bedford next week to remove what they call 'chronic infections' behind the roots of my 2 front teeth which will be removed (so no more butter-melting smiles from me! he he ... ) AND the 4 cavitation infections hiding in the cavities left behind when my wisdown teeth were removed 10 years ago. Its an interesting field (holistic dentistry) which relates these infections not recognized in conventional dentistry to chronic disease due to their potential toxic load on the body. Obviously we all know amalgams and mercury filling are not going to be good for us (if we dont we damn well should!) but I do believe in this body of work too ... our teeth are undoubtably connected to the rest of our body so, added to my continually improving health (yes I have actually been even sleeping almost the whole night through every night lately!!) & this I am really hoping that the healing of these infections will be the straw (or at least something close to a straw) to break the camel's back (though i have rather a lot of 'camels' in my lungs at present), so my immune system can finally 'see' the rogue (naughty!) cells and zap them until they are squished to smithereens and this 32 year old man is completely, 100% and fully CANCER FREE.

I have a dream ...